Mommy is Coming Back

I learned very quickly that Emma Grace is no text book baby. Apparently babies do not come out of the womb having read 15 books on caring for a newborn.  Who knew?  SO now that we are into the age of developing separation anxiety, it should be no surprise to me that she has the worst separation anxiety of any baby we know.  It is clear that when I leave a room, she is terrified that I will not be coming back.  It is absolutely heartbreaking.  In an attempt to find a way to help her get past this stage, I have been reading everything I can find on working through separation anxiety.  Here are a few suggestions I have read…

Make her sleep in her crib/put her down awake so she learns to soothe herself…OH well if only we hadn’t been doing that her entire life then MAYBE that could have helped.

Give her independent play time…AGAIN if only we hadn’t been doing this her entire life.

DO NOT SNEAK OUT, say goodbye, give hugs, tell her you will be back…When I say goodbye, give lots of love and tell her I will be back she SCREAMS because she knows what goodbye means.

When baby is calm, distract her then leave…When I distract her and sneak out she SCREAMS when she realizes that I left.

Go on dates and leave your child with a sitter…HOW IS THIS ADVICE ON SEPARATION ANXIETY?  If my child could handle being SEPARATED from me, I wouldn’t be reading about advice on SEPARATION ANXIETY!  Even so, she has been left with her Mimi or a sitter for date nights, an overnight trip and once a week whenever I am teaching.  Obviously this really helped keep separation anxiety from being an issue for her, or not.

Don’t force it, let her sit on your lap and eventually she will crawl off and leave you herself…LIES

Be positive and upbeat when leaving and returning even if she isn’t…I’m working on it, but you try smiling while your baby is screaming bloody murder because of your choices.  GOOD LUCK.

When nothing works then give up and realize that God is in total control and leaving your baby crying for a few hours a week will not determine if your child is going to cure cancer or end up in prison…Actually, that one is mine.  Everything I read makes me feel like every decision I make will make the difference between a happy, productive life and a criminal.  Thank goodness Emma Grace is God’s child and He has a plan for her because I don’t think I could handle the pressure if it was all dependent on me.

After all my reading do I have any idea how to help Emma Grace’s separation anxiety? No. Every day for the last month it has gotten worse.  I am at a complete loss for what to do.  Sometimes all the advice in the world makes no difference; some babies just aren’t ‘text book babies’.  All I know is that one day in the near, or not so near, future she will know that mommy is coming back for her.  My prayer is that one day she knows that Jesus died for her, rose again for her and is coming back for her.   When I think about that truth then I realize we can both handle a little separation anxiety!


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